"She is a whole two hundred pounds!"
"She weighs ninety kilograms!"
"She's just skin and bones!"
Body mass, or weight, in pounds or in kilos, in the West or in the East, in feather comparison or in stork, is a talked about and worried about issue everywhere. Sadly, more for women than it is for men.
From as little as 10 years or even younger now, a girl child worries about how big they are and for some it becomes an obsession into adult life leading to a life of diets, fad and not and unused perpetual gym memberships and made and broken resolutions year in and year out about 'I need to shed just twenty kilos' and it goes on and on and on and on.
In extreme cases these "weights" throw people into an abyss of unending depression where one eats more, worries more until they snap out it or for some nothing snaps and they crucify themselves to that life.
Snapping out of it isn't as easy as you'd snap those two fingers and it's different for a lot of people. Some decide the one day and get up and do it and never look back and go on to live healthily ever after. For others it's a battle, just the start itself. You one day make the call to the gym about their prices and press the enter button and pay for the year, and go gym clothes shopping and get fired and motivated enough and leave the office early that first week and actually go to the gym. If the stares from the ones who now have decided because they've been at gym longer and know better haven't halted your desire and zeal, you continue week two, and week three and then the following week work gets in the way, for a week, two, a month, two, six months and the year is over and you have only used a month's subscription in the paid up year and you're unhappy with yourself and it starts all over again the following year. It usually starts with a lunch box of carrot sticks replacing your usual chicken and pasta and one and those round big bottles with all sorts of vegetables infused water at your work desk. Do folks actually finish that water? And it's never in small bottles, always a lot of it.
For some, like me, it takes a stern doctor's face looking at your test results following a near fatal "trapped under a five tonnes truck feeling" cardiac scare. And it's not always immediately I was 'warned' in June and ever really got to doing something about it in October, end of October at that26th. I have that day marked, five years ago! I went in, hard, I made it a priority and decided I'm winning it, making daily one hour bus rides from a town I lived in to the city for a one hour class of Zumba and back again home. I read on everything; food, exercise regularity, moderation and especially I read on food because as I pored over the before and after pictures of success stories in weight loss, the one thing that was clear was that the big battle is the food one. And exercise, however much of it only substitutes so little towards weight loss. The big kahuna is the food and a win with the food is two thirds of the battle won. I started to look at food different and made an overhaul and my helper and I worked together at this and won the food battle, five years on I'm happy to say it's a staying win. Knowing what/not to eat; Knowing when to stop; Knowing how portions are important; Knowing that food is primarily and only for nourishment and energy; Knowing that you eat with your eyes first (I made that up, I'm aesthetic).
A lot of times we fill voids in our lives with substances and food is one of the things that we find ourselves abusing, with detrimental results. We eat our pains away, we eat our lonliness away, we eat our depression away, we eat our anxiety away, we eat our financial stress away, and in all of this all we are doing really is compounding our problems and adding another, kilo by kilo. And like everything else it takes one's wanting it and making and taking that decision to work on it, otherwise it's just expired unused memberships and carrot sticks that end in the bin and replaced by a sneaked in delivery from the burger store.
On the other side of (weight) is the confidence issue. We pore over magazines and Instagram timelines to admire fitness models and women that have it together, because, right weight, huh? For me there isn't any right weight, why else would God have made us in our beautiful diverse ways? But that is not what I'm getting at. Have you seen beautiful big people?
Have you seen a gorgeous girl who you're certain is not under hundred kilos but struts and carries that (weight) like it's not an issue and you almost wish you were her? Have you? That ladies and gentlemen is body confidence, one each one of us needs to have or pray and work more about it than at the numbers on the scale. The one we need to impart to our ten year olds as they look into mirrors and start too early in life with the trophy winning question "am I fat mommy/honey/hubby?"
That, over gym membership and pavement pounding and celery and carrots stick eating and bathroom scale business is the magic; body confidence. Hear me, I am not saying don't care for your health or the BMI index or the fat score in your gym assessment card, but when you start there with a healthy attitude about your body, you've won half the battle! We take ourselves apart as women a lot of times; my hips are too wide, my bum is too big, my legs are too skinny, my waist is not small enough, my stomach (four babies later) is not flat enough and my arms are too big. It's unending.
On top of all of this is the "you're fat" used as a greeting, carelessly I might add, said like it's a crime. Oh, that thing spins you around. But see when you're armoured, with loads of self-confidence and you've made peace with and are (or not) working on your weight and miss oh you're fat comes along, you have the longest raincoat for a long walk in the rain and nothing beats that. Strut it baby.